


The Red

by ChromiumHeart



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt, Kylo needs a hug, Punishment, Scars, Starkiller Base, hux is a jerk, post-TFA
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-07
Packaged: 2019-03-01 12:27:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13294869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChromiumHeart/pseuds/ChromiumHeart
Summary: May every day be a reminder of failures past.





	The Red

It was all white noise when the lightsaber activated and went through his fathers chest. There was nothing in his world but this moment; this moment that was supposed to free him from the bonds of conflict and bring him into a new sense of purpose. 

As Han cupped Kylo's face, he went numb. Their eyes met for the final time and his father slipped away; what was supposed to be the end of conflict instead fractured his soul in two. 

Only the pain of the bowcaster shot punching through his left side snapped him back to reality once more, drawing his attention to the girl. Blind with rage, the Force surged within him as he got to his feet and stalked out into the inhospitable atmosphere that was Starkiller Base. 

The frigid wind slid through his hair like skeletal fingers and the cold burned his eyes and skin, but his forehead was slick with perspiration. 

He had taken them both on as pain surged through him like a convulsive electrical shock. When he felt himself weaken, he would put his fist against the bowcaster injury and hit hard to feel the pain flare up again, taking over his senses and leaving him little more than a starved attack animal. His eyes were wild and hair unruly; he looked less like a human and more an unearthly being consumed with pain and sorrow with every passing moment. 

But he foolishly underestimated the girl, who barely missed a killing blow, instead disfiguring his face and causing him to fall to the snow in agony. Most of what happened after that seemed like a blur; he could feel the ground literally split between them, separating them as if they weren't meant to end it all here. That they were meant for something more than this. 

Kylo could feel his blood seeping across his stomach and creeping down his side as he laid in the snow. He didn't consider that this was how he was going to die; he closed his eyes and shivered in the cold wind, blood beginning to run freely down his face. He felt like he was alone for hours though he assumed time passed more slowly when one was dying - he was barely able to lift his head when he faintly heard the sound of snow crunching under boots. Maybe the girl had come back to finish him off. 

"You utter lummox." Hux sneered, looking down at the man that Supreme Leader Snoke assumed would rule the galaxy one day. "Pathetic." 

Troopers scooped Kylo up under the arms; he was too weak to walk so he allowed them to half-drag him to the waiting shuttle in a nearby clearing, leaving streaks of blood in the snow. They laid him down on the ships floor and he opened his eyes to see Hux busying himself with a medical kit. 

Kylo looked away, feeling his face redden as Hux pushed away all the layers of his tunic and tugged his pants down until the bloody wound was visible. He set to work administering the bacta that would close and heal the wound, not wanting him to bleed out before receiving proper medical treatment back on the Supremacy. 

"There." He said, patting the wound and making Kylo cry out in pain, "That will stop you from dying until Snoke has the honor of doing it himself." 

Kylo lifted his hand to his face, touching the bloody wound on his cheek. He hissed in pain and recoiled. The skin around the cut was swollen and felt like tiny needles prickling at his skin. 

"What about..." he trailed off, glancing to Hux before closing his eyes, trying desperately to will his pain away. 

"That? No. I'm not treating it. You can wait until we get back on the Supremacy to have it stitched. It is cauterized enough as it is."

Kylo swallowed and he was certain he could taste the metallic tinge of blood in his mouth. He knew without immediate treatment he would scar; even bacta tanks couldn't heal an injury that had been partially cauterized by a lightsaber. Yet another reason to hide under the mask as he devolved into the monster Snoke was crafting. 

"Every time you look in a mirror, Ren, I want you to know. I want you to know that you failed the First Order; that you're the reason Starkiller was obliterated. You're a failure to the First Order, and I want you to be reminded of it every day for the rest of your life. You're weak and this proves it. What the Supreme Leader sees in someone as infantile and pathetic as you is beyond my comprehension." 

Hux's words burned deep, but he wouldn't dare shed a tear in the presence of the General. He was completely overwhelmed by grief, by pain - by everything. He breathed out slowly, allowing himself to drift on the very edge of consciousness. Every so often Hux would jab him in the side with the toes of his boot, bringing him back just enough for the General to know he wasn't dead. His head would lull to the side and Kylo would groan softly from his place on the floor, and that seemed to placate Hux. 

Maybe if he died here tonight he wouldn't need to face tomorrow. He knew though that the First Order was not that generous, nor was Snoke. His body went numb with shock and the little boy inside of him cried out desperately in the dark for his mother. A tear slipped from his eyes and into the burning wound on his face. He hugged his arms around his midsection, over the bowcaster wound that ached and burned. Blood stained the ships dull durasteel and he was cold. So cold. 

What had he done? 

The girl was right. He was every bit the monster she thought he was.


End file.
